Thursday, April 28, 2016

An Open Letter To My Pace Team


Dear Monstars,

     Early on in the training journey, I knew this would be a fun group. I myself have nothing to compare it to, but I've heard that not all groups are as special as the group we have had this time. From the beginning, I admitted that I was a newb to all of this. I was nervous starting the group and wondering if I would be able to keep up with the long runs and be able to find a place with experienced runners. To say you welcomed me with open arms would be an understatement.

     Through the process you guys have been cheerleaders for me. You have been constantly encouraging, giving me tips and advice, asking me how I'm doing, and overall helping me to build my confidence. I thought that the group would be more competitive. Instead I found that everyone wanted to support me and wanted me to make it to the top of some huge hills. It was never about racing each other, outperforming each other, or proving ourselves. I can't tell you how much it has meant to me to feel like I have a group that has accepted me and helped me to better myself. In my mind, this was not how I pictured the group at all.

     I've appreciated getting to know each one of you. On our long runs, I feel like I would find myself talking to several different people and getting to know things about your families and personal lives. Only knowing each other for a short period of time, it felt like we all just clicked and easily got along.

     Maybe you helped me up a hill, maybe you encouraged me when I was feeling down on myself, maybe you gave me advice on doing my dreaded speed training, (or clapped when I was the last one to finish) maybe you told me I was a runner, granted me with one of my badass badges, listened to me complain about a stupid route, "They said this wasn't hilly." "Riverside Drive again?!" complimented me on the 12 mile that I led, or even stood next to me while I cussed trying to make it to the finish line on a long route, know that each one of you touched me in some way.

     My journey is far from over when the Flying Pig ends, but I want you to know that you all helped me to get my start. It was The Monstars that transformed me into a runner, week by week, on Wednesdays and Saturdays. Thank you.

     I wish you nothing but the best on Sunday and hope to see you as my running buddies in the future.

Love,
Lauren

Tuesday, April 26, 2016

One Day Closer and A Special Thank You

So today I came to school to see that our gym teacher had picked up the shirts for the 26th mile and 5k. I was ecstatic because for the first time everything seemed really close!


I love the logo this year and the branding. The play on the pig "turning 18" is funny and I feel like the theme is a good one for my personality and my first Pig.

So I want to start out by giving my first thank you today. It may be one that has been given before, but I seriously could not have done all of this without my husband, T.J. For those of you that know my husband, you know that he is sort of a workaholic and will spend weekends working and late nights editing on his computer. Even with all that he has had going on, he never once complained about my training. I've been working out about 6 days a week and it usually falls right after work. This means dinner has been left up to him every night. He is a much better cook than me anyways, but it's been nice to not have to worry about where my meals are coming from after a hard workout and being exhausted. All of the meals we eat at home have been nutritious and have really taken into account the foods I am trying to steer away from.

I've needed/wanted running shoes, new running shoes, headphones, tech socks, tech shirts, tech capris, and sports bras. Let's not forget those hefty race fees and cost for being in my training group. TJ never said "wow, you're spending a lot of money." TJ truly has wanted me to have all the tools I need to be comfortable and successful. The early Saturday morning runs have meant I've been ready for bed at about 10:00 p.m. on Fridays. This has often meant that T.J. came home with me even when our friends were out doing other fun activities. After these Saturday runs I usually came home hangry and then took a shower and a nap. How boring of me. Did you read the post about T.J. running up Torrence with me when I was feeling like I wouldn't make it at the Heart Mini? He is truly awesome. Instead of complaining, these are the things I hear, "I'm so proud of you." "You are looking really good." "I know how hard you are working." "I don't mind helping you!"

Today, TJ asked me to stop at home before I went to my workout. When I came home, he said some really nice things to me about how proud he was of this journey that I've taken on. He didn't need to provide me with any gifts after these kind words, yet I got this:
Plus, I got a hydration belt that holds 2 water bottles. I think this will really come in handy when I am running this summer!

I'm not saying that either of us are perfect or that our marriage is perfect. I'm saying that life is so much easier and challenges are so much smoother when you have the right support. T.J. has been the perfect support for me and he truly has wanted this goal as much as I have wanted it for myself. I urge all of you to be your biggest fan for your partner. The difference it makes is huge. I know that it hasn't always been easy for T.J. or fun for him, but I know that he is willing to do it because he is selfless. So to T.J.-- I thank you more than absolutely anybody else in my life. What you have provided for me these last 6 months has been completely invaluable. You have helped me to accomplish difficult goals I have set for myself. You have kept me motivated and have forced me to believe in myself. Thank you for helping me take flight.

Monday, April 25, 2016

Excited, Not Anxious...Yet

As of today, I am not nervous about the race. I have been feeling really excited and just ready for it to be here. I went to an informational meeting about The Flying Pig at Bob Roncker's where people who worked for the marathon talked to us and answered different questions. It was very interesting. Funny story, I was out for a walk last week and actually met the Executive Director, Iris. She lives in my neighborhood and we talked for a few minutes. She was there today and remembered me. She seems so sweet and it's awesome that she works so hard for the organization. They have donated so much money to different charities in the area, and have really brought something unique and quirky to the city that I love so much. It's a lot to be proud of if this is where you call home.

Upon leaving Bob Roncker's I got to pick up my stuff for being a part of the training group.
My new training shirt and Feetures socks. I was hoping for orange shirts, but this will do too.

My friend Kelly bought me these amazing glasses...
Are these not hilarious? I can't wait to wear them post-race on Sunday. I'm having a brunch to celebrate with mimosas.

I want to talk about the people who have made this process so special, but I'm just not ready to say goodbye yet. It's been the journey of a lifetime and although there will be other training groups and marathons, (running is no longer a bucket list item for me) this crew has been extremely special. I will talk more about them on Wednesday after our last training session.

In the meantime, thank you all for cheering me on. You have been one of the biggest reasons that I have known this was possible. Now I feel like the sky is the limit. I am feeling so confident about Sunday and the kind words that you have all given me have resonated.

I'm prepared to fly and ready to spread my wings.

Wednesday, April 20, 2016

Sometimes I Panic

So today the word was given that our coaches do not necessarily run the half marathon with us. I had a hard run today. This may have been because of the heat. I'm not really sure, but it felt like I was riding the struggle bus. It wasn't my worst run, but not my best.

So while running someone mentioned that we would be doing the run on our own on race day. When we got back home I inquired about this and yes, it's true, I may not be running with a coach on race day.

Say what?

Immediately I started panicking. I mean PANICKING. I don't understand. I've always run with a coach. I suck at pacing myself. They've been with me the whole time. How on Earth can I do this on my own?

Several coaches assured me that I'm completely ready for this and I will be fine. I realized I was slightly overreacting. Some of my teammates said they would be willing to meet up and run together.

Although I am still worried, I need to try and keep it positive. I need to understand that this is what my coaches have been preparing me for during the last six months. No matter how hard or how alone I feel, I have to cross that finish line successfully for myself. My biggest worries right now are pacing myself. When I went out by myself on Monday, I finished my first mile in 8 minutes. That's very dangerous for a 13 mile run. I don't have a pacing watch and it's just hard for me to tell what pace my body is running. Sometimes I also need the support of my teammates to tell me I can do it when that negative self talk creeps in.

Everyone is saying the energy of the crowd and the adrenaline will keep me going. I know in my heart I can finish, but I want to be able to finish on the terms that I want. I am really hoping that race day goes well for me. It's so close now that I hope I can take my mind off of it and not freak myself out. I will work hard to stay focused on each day instead of the race ahead.

Monday, April 18, 2016

On Making Excuses

Realizing that this blog is close to over (maybe) I've found the urge to blog more. Today I wanted to discuss something that we all face-excuses. Now this blog may seem a little harsh but know that everything I'm saying is because I've also had an issue with making excuses.

I hear from people a lot about my blog, the weight I have lost, running, the marathon, etc. People usually give me compliments, which are nice and help me stay motivated and then I usually hear these things...

"I could never run that far."
"If I were still young, I'd try it out."
"I need to lose some weight before I can do any serious exercise."
"I would do it if I had the time."
"I wish I could do something like that."

I am here to tell you that you can literally DO ANYTHING! When I started this whole process, I could not run 1 single mile without stopping. Now I am running 12. A woman in my running group has 3 young children and is still with us weekly and doing the recommended workouts daily. We have people in their 60's who are training for the half marathon. One of my coaches just qualified and ran in her first Boston Marathon at age 50. There are all sorts of body types too!

Maybe running is not for you, which I understand, but find what is for you. Maybe it's swimming or dance classes. I've found out that I like boxing. Maybe you like to walk or ride bikes on trails. Maybe you like to flipping mountain climb. Whatever it is, you have to make the time to do it and do it without hesitation.

Throw yourself into the journey wholeheartedly. I have tried before so many times and failed. It's easy to come home and plop yourself on the couch after a long day at work. It's easy to say "I'm so tired." Sometimes you have to take the harder road. It won't always be fun or easy and sometimes you may be tired. Today I worked from 7:30 a.m.-6:00 p.m. I came home and went on an hour run, came inside to eat dinner, meal planned for the week, went to the grocery, then came home and made lunches for the next few days.

I'm not writing this to claim I've found the perfect combination because the truth is, I haven't. My friends know that I often refer to myself as the "hot mess express." My point is you have to dedicate a lot of time and effort into trying to be healthier. It has to be one of the top things on  your priority list or it simply won't work. The amazing part is that once it starts becoming part of who you are, it becomes a lot easier. I'm now able to manage my time a little better. I'm getting better at meal planning healthy meals so I don't constantly have to look up recipes. I exercise 6 days a week and am hardly ever tired or groggy (flashback to last year of having the terrible afternoon crashes.) I want you all to know that I believe in you no matter where you are starting, no matter how fat, skinny, weak, old, young, out of shape, busy, tired, or unable you think you are. The hardest part is telling yourself to take on the commitment and strive for it every single day. Stop telling yourself you can't. Stop making excuses. Tell yourself you are ready. Tell yourself you are able. Tell yourself you want it. Don't stop until you get it.

Why not now? Why not forever?

Saturday, April 16, 2016

Suck It Gilbert

This morning was my second run up Gilbert. If you remember my blog post from the first time I ran this hill, it was the time I almost threw up. Two of my teammates helped to get me to the top because I wanted to give up. They almost had to drag me....

Today was a different experience. We started off our route with Gilbert and I was as little bit nervous, but as I kept going I realized I was feeling pretty okay. Once we get about halfway up Gilbert, we turned right to go up to Eden Park. Cue two more hills. Cue me making conversation with someone from my group while going up the hill. Making conversation while freaking hill running. Who am I? Finally we passed Krohn Conservatory (where I'm told Elvis will be giving out high fives during the Pig) and I made it to the overlook. Yes, I was out of breath but I had made it without even slightly feeling like I was going to throw up. It was one of my biggest confidence boosters so far. I should have gotten a picture at the overlook but there was no water stop there this week. Instead, I'll show you a picture I found on google.

Now imagine the sun coming up over this as a single boat cut through the smooth water. I said it was beautiful about 100 times. I also said "Suck it Gilbert!"

 I conquered something that was so hard to me when I started out. I can't tell you how much this made me believe in myself. After the Heart Mini being so difficult I had a lot of nervousness about The Flying Pig. That race made 13 miles seem absolutely impossible, but after running 12 miles for two weeks in a row, and finally doing Gilbert today without suffering, I feel like this is actually something I CAN do.

Coming back from spring break, this week was a difficult one. I had a lot to get done and I was dealing with some issues on top of just being plain tired. As the school year comes to a close the pressure to perform gets more intense. I seriously got a twitch in my left eye due to stress. This morning as I ran, I realized the twitch did not come into my eye once. Since I started my day off with the run, I had not had a problem with my eye all day long. Running has changed my life, as corny as that may sound.

The journey coming to an end is so bittersweet. I've become so much stronger because of my training. I've met some amazing and incredibly supportive people. I've lost weight and become more happy with myself. I've felt like a stronger woman in general. I know that crossing the finish line will feel so good, but so sad at the same time. My focus has been on nothing else since January. I just can't imagine my life without this goal in it.

Two weeks and counting.

Monday, April 11, 2016

Wanting It To Be Over Before It Started

I know I'm a bit late on this, but Saturday I had what is called the 20/12 "race." It's a gathering of all the running groups in the Cincinnati area and marked as the last long run before tapering starts for the Pig. Thursday I got back from Florida at around 7 p.m. By the way, I did continue my training in Florida. What a beautiful 6 miler and 4 miler I had. Anyways, coming back to Cincinnati and the extreme temperature change, I woke up with killer sinus problems on Friday. I managed to play volleyball in the evening and have some drinks with friends (I only drank water) but I was still feeling exhausted. Naturally Saturday morning at 6:30 I was not thrilled to get up. I had a sinus headache and it was so early after having that late volleyball game. I got up anyways and set out to pick up Liz, who was also participating. As I stepped outside, I realized it was cold....really cold.

Once we got there at about 7:30, we had to stand around and wait for the race to start at 8:00. The wind was whipping and the breeze was freezing. It was in the 30s, which is a lot colder than the 30s in January for some reason. I was trying so hard to warm up, but nothing worked. This really really really really sucked. Finally, we began running. My calves started hurting terribly. I don't know if it was from sitting in a car for 13 hours or what, but it definitely didn't feel good. Then it started snowing... All of the groups were sharing a sidewalk and it felt crammed starting out, with a lot of stopping, going, and trying to dodge around people.

It was mile 1 and I wanted it to end. Only 11 more to go.

As we approached mile 3, our coach told us if we were having aches and pains and felt like we needed to stop that this would be a good time to turn around. I seriously considered it. Then I realized that being sore is not the same thing as being injured and I was just trying to get out of doing it. So I kept going.

As we continued running I felt slightly guilty for having a sour attitude and mentioned it to one of my teammates. He suggested I give myself a half a mile to complain about everything I wanted and then not do it for the rest of the run. This was around mile 6. So in my head I let everything out. I griped about my runny nose, how cold I was, how much the course sucked, how tired I was, how my calves hurt, etc. After that I actually did feel better. Maybe it was because I was past the halfway point, but I became more excited to finish.

And finish I did, quite strong actually. The end had several hills and I just kept trudging up each one that was in front of me, pushing myself to finish the race with my head up. There were goodies waiting at us for the finish line. Thanks to all who sponsored the race and to the Flying Pig for their "random oinks of kindness" along the route.

I came home and took a 2 hour nap and I actually felt good enough to brave the cold once again to watch FCC take the field at Nippert Stadium. I ended up with around 33,000 steps. Then I slept in on Sunday until 11 a.m. I'm finally feeling like myself again. The 12 miler actually gave me more confidence about taking on the pig in such extreme conditions with my mind not being in the right place. I've said it before, but sometimes the mental barriers are the hardest to overcome. I was thankful that I was able to overcome these barriers and show myself I was capable. 

Will I call myself a runner yet? 

Saturday, April 2, 2016

A 12 Miler Makes Me So Happy!

So today we had a 12 mile run. T.J. woke up around the same time as me this morning and I told him I was nervous and I had no idea why. I still don't know why because after conquering this run, I realized how prepared I was to do it. We started at Ault Park and it was quite chilly in comparison to the nice spring weather we've been having lately. One of my coaches was in Lexington running a half marathon. Around mile 4 we had a water stop. My coach Jerry says "Hey, Lauren. Do you think you can lead the group the rest of the way?" Jerry had to stop because he was having some pain and needed to take it easy after an injury. I was unsure about doing it. I told him I knew very little about pacing but he assured me that I would do fine. This was a new challenge for me, but I wanted to do it. I wanted to help my team.

The next miles put me in a great mental place. We were going around Lunken Airport trails and it was actually a very pretty route. I enjoyed talking to my group and making sure everyone was okay and feeling good. I was able to mentally tell myself I had to keep going because all of these people were behind me. The thoughts of stopping barely entered my mind. I had a member tell me to slow down at one point because we were going too fast and I appreciated that. I need to invest in a watch so I can get better with my pacing and I honestly want to make that a goal for myself to help my running improve.

The Monstars all made it back, even heading up about a mile long extremely steep hill. I felt proud of myself and my team. Some people decided to take a shortcut on the way back, which was fine, but I wanted to prove to myself that I could keep going. I didn't want to cheat myself of any miles because I knew that I needed them. So I made it all 12.25 miles, which makes the Pig seem like it will be so very attainable.

When we got back a lot of people on my team thanked me. This made my heart swell. Seriously. Then I came home to see this stuff on facebook. More swelling of heart....


I am in no way trying to brag here, although it may sometimes feel like it on this blog. I'm just so amazed when I think about where I started and how this is not the place where I thought I would be. I honestly thought I would have quit or given up by now, so to be in this place is more than I could have every imagined for myself and for my health. 


My mom made a coffee cake for me to take- cinnamon crumble on top and chocolate chips inside. Thanks mom! This and the other treats brought by runners was a nice way to round at the morning.   If you look down below those are actually some of the trails I was running on today.

I've gotta keep moving today before I enter the 13 hour car ride to Florida, which may be hard on my muscles after the long run today. Off to pack!